The One Thing We Must Always Be
by Crow Dancer
Summary: In which Merida decides to take the betrothal with no complaints and maybe give her mother a reason to be proud of her. But fate has different ideas and one argument, dramatic exit, and sudden accident later, Merida and three unexpected allies have to adjust, survive, and find their way home before an ancient curse tears their kingdom apart.
1. A Princess Always Strives For Perfection

It was not like Merida disliked her duties. It wasn't like that at all. She most certainly did not want to spend her life aimlessly riding her horse through the hills, shooting at wooden targets. She certainly did not want to live some useless, carefree life; contributing nothing to the world, and avoiding all responsibility. She knew what her place in the world was now, and what it would be.

And how she desperately tried to love and appreciate it.

She did. She really did. Queen Merida of DunBroch. How great it sounded. Her people would admire and respect her. She would be wise and diplomatic. She would be held in awe and feared by their enemies, and at the same time respected and loved by her own people and she would lead them into an age of power and security and reassure them that her parents taught her well. She would protect her people from any clans that dared to threaten them. She pictured herself at the front of the battle with her general to her right and her loyal people behind her. She would lead the charge with an arrow drawn and ready to take the life of the enemy and-

"A lady enjoys elegant pursuits."

And there was the problem.

"A princess should not have weapons."

Merida knew her duties.

"A princess must be knowledgeable about her kingdom."

She cared about her duties more than they knew.

"Pronounciate! You must be understood from anywhere in the room, or it's all for naught."

But she wasn't a perfect diplomat.

"She doesn't make a doodle!"

Or a perfect artist.

"That's a C dear."

Or a perfect student.

"A Princess doesn't chortle."

She tried, she really really did. For the longest time, she tried her hardest to be a Lady. At the age of twelve, her beloved bow found itself locked in a chest under her bed, where it would gather dust for the next several years. She even stopped her training with the sword.

"Above all…"

She came to a realization on her fifteenth birthday.

"A Princess strives for perfection."

_I will never be perfect._

Merida was not a Lady. She was none of the things that her mother was, and not for lack of trying either. She tried so hard that sometimes it hurt so bad she could barely keep from screaming.

Elinor loved her daughter; she wanted what was best for her. So she tried to teach her anything and everything she might need to know. It just never crossed her mind that somewhere along the way her expectations might have gotten a little out of control and she never understood why Merida just couldn't seem to reach them, so she did the only thing she could think of and pushed even harder.

And one day, after coming to the conclusion that she would never be perfect, Merida found herself sitting on her bedroom floor, staring at the _graceful_ and _elegant_ piece of woodwork, the bowstring long since rotted away.

Maybe she still knew how to use it?


	2. A Princess Always Does Her Duties

Merida sighed and tucked the bow away again. She had given up this path a long time ago and dwelling on it would only bring temptation. She tried not to think about how much she missed the feeling of satisfaction as the arrow hit its mark. There was no future in weapons for a princess. But still...she wondered if she could still make a decent shot.

Elinor called again and with a sigh, Merida pulled herself up. It wouldn't do to leave them waiting and she was getting hungry. The heavy door of her bedroom closed loudly and she winced. A headache was beginning to form and that was the last thing she needed at the moment. Thankfully the corridors were empty so she didn't need to stop and exchange pleasantries with anyone. But then again, it left her to ponder her situation.

In the days since Merida had decided that she would never be perfect, it seemed that her mother was more determined than ever to make her so. The lessons had increased, the breaks few and far between. Her voice seemed to have a sharper edge to it than usual and several times when Merida couldn't remember how to pronounce a certain word, or missed a note on her harp, she was sure the queen was about to lose her temper.

But Merida ignored her. She had decided that she would do her best and not worry about it. But still, there was that little aching desire, carefully locked away in the back of her mind, that cried out to prove that she could do something right. That she was good enough. The desire for her mother to tell her that she didn't need to try and be perfect anymore.

The headache had worsened significantly by the time she reached her family. Fergus was telling the boys the tale of Mor'du, oblivious to Hamish was miming him perfectly, right down to the drumstick-sword. Merida couldn't help herself as she swooped in, knocking Harris off his chair in the process, and finishing the story, unable to resist throwing in a bear growl.

"That's my favorite part," Fergus grumbled.

Merida giggled and helped herself to a drumstick. While she didn't understand why losing his leg was his favorite part of the story (sounded like it would hurt an awful lot), she had to admit that it was the most fun to tell.

Her mother looked up from what looked like a small pile of letters. "A princess is never late."

"Yes Mum," Merida said, forcing a smile and suppressing a wince. A princess does not grumble.

That seemed to be the end of their conversation, and Merida began to drift off as fantasies of bows and swords and armies took over. In one such fantasy, she was accompanying her father on a hunt with a group of men. The men didn't matter though. What mattered was her riding on Angus with her hood pulled up, arrow drawn and at the ready. Her father patted her back and squinted into the dark forest.

"There," He whispered, pointing at a hidden trail.

The pair slowly made their way through the trees, deeper into the woods. The light only barely filtered through the trees, and the sounds of birds and insects and creatures was strangely absent.

"Close now," He said. "Can you feel him watching?"

Merida nodded and held her breath. The hair on the back of her neck raised and she broke out in goosebumps. The grip on her bow tightened as she put her focus on controlling her breathing. Her eyes widened as two yellow eyes peered out from the darkness.

"THERE!" Fergus cried.

A battle cry erupted from Merida and she charged forward, taking aim as a set of jaws larger than anything she'd ever seen flew out of the darkness and-

"Oh wonderful!"

And reality.

"Hmm?" Fergus looked up from a mouthful of food.

"They've accepted," She told him.

Whoever accepted what must have been a big deal because Fergus suddenly looked like he'd rather be anywhere else. Merida looked back and forth between her parents with wide eyes. "Who's accepted what, Mother?"

"Boys, you are excused," Elinor said.

The triplets wasted no time making a break for it. She turned her attention back to Merida. "You're father as something he'd like to discuss with you."

Obviously Fergus didn't think so. He coughed and choked on his water and and gave her a pleading look.

Elinor sighed and shook her head. Then she smiled at her daughter. "The lords are presenting their sons as suitors for your betrothal." She looked excitedly, as if this was the most wonderful news she had heard.

"What?" Was all she could say.

Elinor continued, oblivious to her daughter's distress. "Each clan will present a suitor to compete in the games for your hand."

Merida sucked in a breath as her stomach seemed to turn itself inside out. Not knowing what to say, she turned to her dad, praying for a sign that this was all just some sort of sick joke. He just gave her a helpless look. Her heart began to pound as these words set in.

Obviously Elinor had expected a different reaction. "Honestly Merida I don't know why you're reacting this way." Her voice was laced with disapproval.

Always. Always laced with disapproval. Because apparently it was wrong for Merida to dare to be upset with the news that her life was about to end, and that something as intimate as love and marriage had become yet one more thing that was completely out of her control. If Elinor thought that this was a bad reaction, Merida wondered what she would think if she knew that the mother of all fits was lurking just below.

But the Princess knew better than to argue with the Queen.

Swallowing the lump in her throat, Merida choked out, "So I suppose this isn't optional."

"No, it is not," Elinor said firmly. Clearly she was unhappy (she was always unhappy) with her daughter's less then thrilled attitude.

"Then my I be excused," Merida said quietly (a princess does not raise her voice). Instead of waiting for an answer though, she stood up and all but ran from the hall, ignoring her mother's calls.

Maybe in another story, Merida might have snapped at her mother that she would never go through with it. She would've kicked and screamed and argued.

Everybody has that little piece of them. The piece that is whiny and lazy and selfish. The part that urges one to cast away all responsibilities no matter who they might hurt. In Merida's case, it was the part of her that wanted to take her bow and sword, pack her things, and ride off with Angus to unknown places, leaving her family to deal with it without a care in the world.

But Merida knew who she was and who she was would never do something so careless.

So instead she went outside and headed for a place where she could sit and clear her head completely uninterrupted.

Reaching Angus's stable, she threw herself in, slammed the door, and it was there that she broke down. Silent sobs shook her body and she curled up in the hay. Alarmed, Angus bent down and nuzzled her hair. He didn't understand what was going on, but his human was upset and he didn't like that. Humans were such sensitive things.

"What do I do Angus? My life's about to end and there's not a damn thing I can do to stop it." Merida sniffed. "Because Princesses do not groan, or whine, or argue. They do not go against their duties. This is my _duty_. It is always about my _duty_."

"I don't want this. I hate this. I don't want my duties! I don't want any of it!" She cried, her arms wrapping around the horse's neck. "And the worst part? I know I won't fight it. I will put a dainty little smile on my face and I will do my duty to my kingdom because that's what princesses do."

Angus snorted softly and she hugged him tighter. "If I were to refuse to go through with it, we would go to war."

"Who can argue with something like that?"

Her companion didn't reply.

"I didn't mean what I said. You know, about my duties?" She said quietly. "I just...I wish there was a bit more room. I wish I could be me once in a while. I wish that my father wasn't so wrapped around my mother's finger. I know it upset him when I stopped my training. I wish he could make Mother understand that I really did try to be her but...I just couldn't do it anymore. I wish she would for once, just see that I am not her."

"But you know what I wish for most of all Angus?" She pulled herself up and brushed herself off. The tears finally dried up. She was exhausted.

"I wish _I_ could actually remember who I am."


	3. A Princess Enjoys Elegant Pursuits

Today was the day that the four clans would arrive. The games would being tomorrow Elinor had Merida up at the crack of dawn to start the process of poking and prodding and fussing over what to do about her hair.

Merida didn't know exactly what was wrong with it but she held her tongue.

One horribly tight corset, uncomfortably restricting dress, and, in her opinion, horrid looking wimple and band, Elinor deemed her ready for public display. "You look absolutely beautiful!" She cooed.

Unable to hold in a groan, Merida looked at her pleadingly. "It's too tight!"

"Oh hush," Elinor said, still beaming. "Give us a turn!"

Somehow, she managed to do an awkward turn that looked more like a waddle. Catching herself in the mirror, she looked at the wimple bitterly. While she didn't know who she was, she knew without a doubt that this certainly was not it.

The servant girls in the castle said her hair was beautiful.

"Merida."

She turned back around to face her mother and was rather startled. Elinor looked like she was about to cry. "Mum?"

"Just..." She paused and Merida felt her heart speed up a little. Maybe she would tell her how proud she was of her. Maybe she would tell her that she appreciated her cooperation and that she knew this wasn't easy and that-

"Remember to smile."

_Oh. Okay._

"Places everyone!"

Stumbling over to her usual seat, Merida breathed heavily through the dress. She felt like a snake had wrapped itself around her chest. She hated how it seemed to be necessary to dress her up like some kind of a doll.

_Cause that's all I am now. I am literally a prize in a game._

She tried to sit there with her head held high, but when they brought in the suitors, she started to feel slightly sick. Also, she found herself really despising being called a "Fair Maiden". It was also rather upsetting at how willing her parents were to sell her. Maybe they would be horrified to find out that she was thinking in such brutal terms, but that was exactly what it was.

Before the poor announcer could finish, the Lords burst through the door, knocking him out of the way. Dingwall, Macintosh, and MacGuffin. Three cranky old men who tried their best to look dignified as they marched in, yet looked more like small children pretending to be Lords.

Fergus stumbled on the introduction for several seconds before the Queen stepped in. "The Presentation Of The Suitors" is what she called it.

Macintosh was first. He gave some crackpot introduction while his pretty boy son flexed his abs and played with his sword a little. Merida pulled her wimple down, covering her face. Well it couldn't get more awkward than that could it?

Apparently it could.

MacGuffin was next. And while his introduction was as phony as the last, the young MacGuffin looked like he was just as reluctant to be there as Merida. She found that oddly reassuring. If he could be as scared as she was and still keep his head up, she would do the same. With a tiny sigh, she uncovered her eyes and sat up straight.

Well he doesn't look too bad, She thought. Maybe this isn't going to be completely painful-

Oh God, Dingwall's son!

She looked with wide eyes as the large, tan piece of meat moved out of the way to reveal the...strange little person hiding behind him. Lord Dingwall then launched into how his son took out a ship, while the boy just stood there with a glazed over expression. To be honest, Merida thought he looked slightly hungover.

Peace be damned, if he wins I am through! No money, food, or power in the world is going to make me share a bed with that!

A scream brought her back to reality. The courtyard had erupted into a brawl. And despite her thoughts, she did admit it was impressive and rather amusing to see that Wee Dingwall (was that really his name?) had sunk his teeth into Macintosh's shoulder.

After Fergus tried and failed to calm everybody down (courtesy of the triplets and a rather large spiked club and seriously who built all those tunnels through the castle?) and Elinor had _made_ everybody calm down, she continued with the introduction.

"In accordance with our laws, only the first born of each of the great leaders may be presented as champions, and thus, compete for the hand of the Princess of DunBroch."

_First born? Maybe I could_- Merida perked up, but only for a second before she banished the thought. Such an act would only bring a lot of trouble and possibly quite a bit of pain, depending on who was angrier.

"-for the challenge to be determined by the Princess herself-"

What! Merida snapped back to reality. What was that about her? Did she have to say something? Wide eyed, she looked at her mother.

"The Princess will announce her decision tomorrow before the games."

Well at least she had that long. Just nothing that would give that Dingwall boy an edge, if that was even possibly. Merida sighed and stood up as everyone filed into the castle. The Lords and their sons would be led to their chambers for the night.

Last night of freedom. She knew it, and she knew at least one of the boys knew it. Whether the other two cared or not was rather hard to tell; though it didn't really matter in the long run anyways.

She passed a guard that seemed to be missing half his mustache and didn't even have to guess how that came about. A giggling behind her answered that question. With a smirk, she turned and grabbed Hubert, tossing him into the air. "I got you now ya little demon! Two more to go!"

He giggled with delight as Merida tossed him over her shoulder. Hamish and Harris squealed and took off, their big sister close behind. They wouldn't disappear into the walls for this game. It would make it too easy.

"Merida!" Elinor tried to scold. "A Princess does not-"

But with an extra burst of speed, Merida quickly escaped earshot. After all, if she couldn't hear the orders, she couldn't disobey right?

* * *

Sleep was futile.

After the much needed distraction of getting the triplets nice and wound up right before bed, Merida had tried to heed her mother's words about getting a good night's rest. She tossed in her bed, her heart pounding. Anxiety building up like a tower ready to crumble with the first strong wind. She groaned. She glared at the turquoise dress hanging in her closet.

Her mother had steadfastly ignored that she was more miserable than she had ever been in her life. Yes, she knew that Elinor had once been the Fair Maiden herself. She knew that it must have been scary.

But Elinor was also a Proper Lady. Gifted in music and writing and public speaking and dress wearing. She was a diplomat. She had the role of Princess perfWilected since the beginning.

_Perfect_. That stupid word again.

And it had all worked out for her hadn't it? Elinor and Fergus. Perfect fit there. Fergus may be King, but the Queen had him wrapped around her little finger.

And suddenly, Merida felt a flare of anger toward her father. A spineless, apathetic pushover. Took on the roll of father when it was easy and convenient and fun. As soon as it stopped being fun, he handed the title back and went to play with those stupid greyhounds of his.

It had hurt her, when he saw how upset she was, that he hadn't come to talk to her. To at least try to make it better. She expected it with Elinor, who put up no illusions of compassion towards her daughter's plight. But Fergus...he couldn't even be the one to tell her. Because it was just too damn hard. So he passed the duty over to the stern, demanding matriarch because he just couldn't bear to be the bad guy.

_Coward_. And Merida felt like crying. She was always her daddy's girl when she was younger. He took her riding, showed her how to use a sword. He gave her her first bow when she was six. But as soon as she grew up a little, and things got hard, he was in the background, laughing and joking and handing all responsibility to her mother.

_Coward,_ She thought again.

Well, there was no way she was sleeping now. Her stomach growled loudly.

_Well, the kitchen's as good an idea as any._

Merida crept through the castle barefoot, her black shoes held in one hand. No matter how hard she tried, those blasted things made horrible noise on the floorboards. It wouldn't do to wake her parents up and her father had the ears of a hawk. Probably most likely contributed to his paranoia about bears and one bear in particular.

Past her parents, past the triplets, past Maudie the nurse, down two flights of stairs, bypassing the servants quarters, and she was about to round the corner when-

"Honestly, I'll throw the game if I have to. There is no way I'm marrying her Princess or not!"

_What the..?_ Merida stopped at the corner and slowly peered around. She was surprised to see the suitors sitting around the dining room table. Several bottles of her father's wine stash sat in the middle. It had been Macintosh who had spoke.

MacGuffin said something unintelligible.

The Dingwall boy spoke up. "Come on, she doesn't look bad or anything."

"Hmph. Not half as pretty as the girl I have at home. If she's so great than you marry her."

Dingwall shrugged uncomfortably. "Even if you threw the game, I'd probably still find a way to lose. Besides, she's not exactly my type."

Okay, I've heard enough. Merida strode around the corner, shoulders slouched casually. "Well if it's any consolation, you lot aren't exactly my type either."

Macintosh let out a small shriek and Dingwall fell off his chair. MacGuffin just reddened and waved sheepishly. Merida rolled her eyes and grabbed one of the bottles and popped it open. "What a manly scream of terror you have there Mac," She said wryly.

"What're you doin' here?" He grumbled, blushing furiously.

Merida shrugged and sat down in her mother's chair. "Couldn't sleep. By the looks of it neither could you. Not looking forward to tomorrow I take it?"

Wee Dingwall sat there with his hand propping his head up. "No offence to you ma'am. I'm sure you'll make a wonderful bride. Though I'm assuming that you didn't have much of a choice either?"

"Nah. It's this or our parents to war right?" She took another drink.

Macintosh sighed. "This whole thing's ridiculous is what I think!"

Merida slouched back in her seat and raised her wine. "To our beloved freedom, may it rest in peace I guess?" She offered.

"I'll drink to that!" Macintosh laughed. Dingwall and MacGuffin raised their bottles too. He frowned as he watched Merida drain nearly half the bottle. "Sure you don't want to slow down?"

"Oh please. I could drink you under the table in minutes," Merida smirked.

"Oh really?"

Twenty minutes later, with MacGuffin bringing more drinks and Dingwall gleefully keeping score, Macintosh had succeeded in spilling his last drink down his front. Merida laughed, though she was feeling rather woozy.

"How the hell are you still standing?" Macintosh sputtered.

"In case you're forgetting, I was raised by the Bear King. This is what he used when he couldn't find me any juice." She laughed.

Macintosh threw his hands in the air, or tried at least. "Alright, I'm done. All hail Merida The Bear Queen!"

The three boys did an extravagant bow. Giggling, Merida stuck her nose in the air and did her best impression of her mother. "Now my loyal subjects, as your queen, I hereby declare that our young people can get married to whoever they damn well please!"

It wasn't as funny as anything else she could have said, but it was what she wanted to say. Everyone looked solemn for a second, and then MacGuffin slowly began to clap. It was followed by Macintosh who gave her a wide grin.

"I don't know about them, but I'd gladly follow you m'Lady," He said, giving her a proper bow.

Her cheeks flushed. A large smile stretched across her face.

Merida the Bear Queen.

She rather liked the sound of that.


	4. A Princess Always Behaves Appropriately

When one drinks over their limit, even a little bit, one might feel slightly detached from their current situation. They might lose awareness of their own actions. One also tends to forget their standard social etiquette when they've had one beer too many.

And when "one" happens to be "four juveniles who happen to be high class and happen to be connected through a rather unique set of circumstances" and happen to be rather stressed, and very tired well...

Inviting the sons of the three lords who happen to also be her suitors up to her bedroom was probably not one of Merida's greatest ideas.

But don't get the wrong idea. It wasn't like that.

Once the wine dried up and the pantry was raided, Macintosh started playing with a wooden sword that the triplets must have left lying around. Merida watched as he tried to duel Dingwall, who tended to duck and stumble away everytime the sword got too close, harmless as it was.

The four could hold their liquor well enough. They just happened to have had a lot of it.

"So wha's yer first names guys?" Merida asked. "I dunno what to call ya. You gotta give me something or I swear I'm just gonna make something up."

Dingwall flinched away from the sword again. "Wee's just what me dad calls me o course. It's William." He yelped as Macintosh's sword barely grazed his shoulder. It was obvious he had no interest or talent in swordplay. "Will to my friends! Which I guess is you! ...right?" He added uncertainly.

"Will Dingwall," Merida looked thoughtful. "Alright? Macintosh, what about you?"

He laughed and Will Dingwall made a feeble attempt to strike a blow. "Well, my mum calls me Cormac, and people who are trying to be funny call me Cormacintosh" He said. "They're not bein funny, by the way. They're being stupid."

Suddenly he yelled out something that sounded rather like a foreign curse, as Will managed to bring the sword down on his foot. The youngest Dingwall looked very surprised, and then rather proud. Merida reckoned that it might've been the first blow he had ever landed.

"What about you?" Merida turned to MacGuffin.

He shrugged and said something that she couldn't quite make out. Her face scrunched as she leaned in closer to try to make him out.

"What was that?"

MacGuffin inhaled deeply, getting look of deep concentration before he tried again. This time, she was able to make something familiar out. "Gavin?"

He nodded, beaming that she had got it and she wondered how often that happened?

Merida smiled, pulling herself out of her chair. "Alright. Cormac, William, and Gavin, I am Merida. It is a pleasure to make your acquaintance and I believe it's my turn with the sword."

Cormac raised an eyebrow. "Does the Princess know how to use one?"

"Quite." She took the sword Will was holding and turned to face Cormac. A bubble of excitement rose in her chest "Alright. Let's go."

Grinning, he charged her.

It was nothing like a serious battle. They stumbled around, swinging wildly, laughing at their own clumsiness. The movements were slow and clunky, but there were traces of skill somewhere in there.

The battle lasted a minute before she was disarmed (or at least got too tired to hold her sword up), though Cormac was grinning widely. "I must say," He panted. "You're not half bad. We'll have to duel properly sometime."

Merida flushed with pleasure. "You should have seen me four years ago. I was much better."

Will sat back at the table looking thoughtful. "I remember hearing my dad grumble once. That the "blasted King" wouldn't stop bragging 'bout his daughter's archery skills. That true? Cause I didn't believe it at the time."

"Aye. It was a while ago though," Merida sighed. She raised her voice an octave and said in her snottiest impression, "A Princess should not have weapons in _my_ opinion. "

"Yer mum sounds like a wet blanket," Cormac said. "I have three sisters and me mum never had a problem with them learning how to fight."

"Yeah," Merida agreed. "It's like something crawled up her arse years ago and never came out."

And then, the idea came to her. At the time, it seemed like a great idea. These were her friends right? Honestly, she was having more fun than she could remember. Talking about swords and fighting, drinking wine and ale straight from the bottle...it was all coming so naturally to her. Something about them just made her want to open up and tell them everything.

Friends share secrets with each other right?

"You wanna see something?" She said, a grin spreading across her face.

In fairness to her, those boys should have known better too.

* * *

Excited to show her new friends, Merida grunted as she pulled out the old chest from under her bed. The boys were on their knees on the floor gathered around her in a semi circle, leaning in to see what had gotten her so excited.

Clicking the chest open, Merida lovingly pulled out her treasured bow. It shone, bone white in the light of the fire. "This," She announced, "Is Matilda."

Yes it was a strange name, but it was hers and she'd name it whatever she wanted thank you very much!

Cormac held his hand out, waiting for her permission to let him touch it. With a small grin, she pressed it into his hands and watched as he turned it around. "What a piece of work," he murmured. "It's rather big though. It looks like it would still fit you!"

"I was very tall," Merida shrugged. "And it probably would now that I think about it...here, let me see."

She took it back and, as if there was a string attached, took position. Without a string she couldn't be completely sure, but it felt okay. "I don't know why I ever stopped," She sighed.

"Why did you stop?" Will asked.

"I knew my mum didn't like it. 'A Princess should not have weapons' is what she used to say. I thought that if I stopped then maybe..." She stopped, then sighed. "Doesn't matter now. Not like it did any good anyways."

"I don't get it," Cormac frowned. "She's yer mum right? Did she really have that much of a problem that you'd give up something you love?"

"It's not that easy though!" Will said suddenly. "Me Dad is always grumbling that I can't use a sword or shoot a bow. You're good at that stuff! And all that crock they were saying about us; at least yours was believable. There's no way anyone would ever believe I'm even remotely capable of anything other than tripping over air."

Cormac looked thoughtful, as if he had never thought that parents could be anything less than supportive of their children's talents. And all things considered, he probably hadn't. After all, he really was the ideal son for the Lord of a clan of warriors. Handsome, strong, and talented with the sword. And it sounded like he was probably really close to his father.

Merida looked at Gavin who seemed to be playing with his fingers. "What about you? Your Dad bug you about anything?"

Gavin nodded. He started to speak, all the while pointing at himself.

"He wishes...that you could speak...like us?" Merida didn't want to say better. She held her breath, hoping she didn't offend him.

But he smiled and nodded earnestly. But he also shrugged, indicating that it wasn't really a big thing anyways.

They lapsed into silence again, all looking rather thoughtful. Merida had to contain her surprise. Of all of them, the one that seemed to understand her the most, and that she had the most in common with, was William Dingwall of all people. Both unfit in their roles, with parents that only saw what they wanted them to be.

"You know..." Cormac said. "That whole guard dog thing you had going on today was pretty cool. My father would probably hit me for saying that, but you should have seen the look on his face. Last time I saw him he was still rubbing his shoulder."

Will gave him a sheepish smile.

Merida smiled at all of them, absentmindedly stroking her bow. "I was thinking," She said quietly. "About tomorrow. I think I'm going to go with archery. Would that be alright?"

"Sure," Will shrugged looking indifferent. "I'm not good at any of that so it makes about zero difference to me. Hell, as long as I don't have to go anywhere near a sword."

Gavin shrugged and nodded. Cormac however, looked surprised. "Why archery? You're not thinking of finding some sort of loophole and competing for your own hand are you?"

Merida almost laughed. "No, nothing like that. Though the thought might have crossed my mind once or twice," She added. "Have any of you really trained with a bow?"

As she expected, they all shook their head. "Exactly. I don't want any unfair advantages. You all have to be as equally screwed as I am. Everyone has the unfortunate chance of winning _this_," To make her point she burped loudly, earning herself a round of chuckles.

"Alright then," Cormac said. Then he yawned loudly and stood himself up. He held out a hand to Merida, who accepted, also pulling herself up. Her legs ached slightly.

Will bowed. "Well my Lady, it has been a surprisingly insightful night but I suppose we all best get some sleep. Tomorrow promises to be..." He couldn't seem to find the right word but they all understood. Cormac and Gavin each gave her a small wave and Merida curtseyed because why not.

And that might have been the end of it. They might have all gone to bed, gotten up the next day, and rode out to the games and afterwards Merida and one of her suitors-no, _friends_, would have been married the day after and that would be that.

That might have happened, had William not tripped over the coat rack, making enough noise to wake the whole castle. Four pairs of eyes widened as the bedroom door burst open to reveal the Bear King himself, sword raised, the Queen, in her nightgown not far behind.

"Merida are you alri-" He stopped at the sight of the three very frozen, and very terrified boys. In his daughters room. In the middle of the night. The Queen peered into the room and gasped, hand flying to her heart and for a moment, nobody dared move a muscle.

Then slowly, Queen Elinor turned to face her daughter. Face contorted into a snarl.

"Everybody," She hissed. "Kindly get. Out. Now."


	5. A Princess Never Loses Control

Mum I-"

"Don't!" Elinor snarled. "Don't you even dare to try and explain this one!"

Merida swallowed. She was fully aware of what was going through her mother's head and cursed herself for how badly she had managed to messed up this time. One glance at the look on the Queen's face and there was nothing but dust where those boys were standing. She wondered for a second if her father had gone after them and immediately paled. If he hurt them, then it would be her fault.

Taking a deep breath, she held herself up straight and looked her mother in the eyes. "I was showing them my bow. That was all. I was showing them my bow and we were talking about what will happen tomorrow."

Her mother advanced on her and she sighed because she just knew that her mother wouldn't believe her. "If you think for a second I believe that rubbish then you have another thing coming to you."

"Well it's a good thing-"

"Have you no sense of decency?" Elinor roared so loudly Merida flinched and took a large step back. "I know I raised you better than this lass and I swear I'll see those men beaten within an inch of their lives, war be damned!"

Elinor looked about ready to strike her if poked with a sharp enough stick, and although Merida knew deep down that her mother was only angry and most likely would not follow through with her threat, Merida's insides boiled at the thought of harm coming to what she decided in that very moment were _her boys_ and before she could stop it a scream ripped from her throat.

"Don't you dare!" She pointed a finger at her mother. "Don't you ever say something like that! I don't care what you think of me anymore but don't you hurt them!"

"Merida!"

"I'm putting up with this mess silently aren't I? I'm not complaining am I?" She restrained herself from stamping her foot. "And I have news for you! They don't want this anymore than I do! Every one of us is doing it because those stupid men can't go more than five minutes before somebody starts throwing rocks!"

"That is enough!" Elinor snarled. "I have half a mind to give you a good whipping if you don't stop this nonsense!"

"Of course! That's what it comes down to right?" Merida said angrily. "Well you know what? We didn't do anything wrong! They did not do anything wrong. In fact, the only wrong thing we've done is go along with this silently!"

"Merida, you listen here-"

"No!" Merida shouted. This was it. No turning back. She grabbed one of the swords that were hanging over the fireplace. "I've listened. Now you listen. I've tried so hard! You think I haven't don't you? Well truth be told I just gave up because I accepted that I will never reach your precious perfection!"

She wanted to stop there, but knew if she didn't get it all out she would never get another chance. Somehow, she had her mother's full attention. "Face it Mother, I'm not a Lady! I am not some dainty little thing! I am none of the things that you think a Princess should be and my God I tried so hard but nothing has ever been good enough for you! This!" She swung her sword expertly to emphasize her point. "This is what I'm good at! This is who I am and I just need you to accept that I will never be the Lady you wanted." She was all but begging.

"Oh you are acting like a child!" Elinor snorted, crossing her arms.

Oh that was it. It was Merida's turn to snarl. "Well you know what? I can see why Fergus got the title the Bear King! God knows he married one!"

"Merida!"

"And you know what else? The only mistake I've ever made is packing my bow away like some sort of child's toy! So you can take all your harps, and sewing needles, and stupid little dresses," She turned her eyes on the horrid turquoise dress hanging on it's hook. "And take it all straight to hell!"

"Merida no!"

The sword sliced cleanly down the middle of the dress, the pieces hanging there limply. Breathing heavily, she glared defiantly at her mother, ready for the worst beating she would probably ever receive, but that would be okay, because she felt strangely content now that she had said her piece. In fact, she felt like she could handle anything.

She had never been more wrong.

Elinor's face contorted into such a look of anger that Merida actually took a quick step back as she advanced, bracing herself for a slap. But Elinor hadn't come for her; and how stupid is was of her to leave her beloved Matilda lying on her bed.

"You are a Princess," Elinor said furiously. "I expect you to act like one."

Merida shrieked and lunged for her bow, but it was no use, and suddenly she was watching the wood crackle and burn in the fire.

Elinor turned back with a cold expression, but it faltered when she saw the look on her daughter's face.

It felt like something was choking her. Merida stared at the fireplace for several seconds, unable to breath. Then slowly, she turned to her Mother who didn't look nearly as sure of herself now. She just gave her a blank and empty look, and then, not thinking, not seeing, she fled the room faster than she ever would have thought herself capable of.

Through the hall, down some stairs, through the courtyard, barely noticing the three boys shouting her name in what sounded like concern as she escaped out to the stables; this time, without even bothering with the saddle, swung herself onto Angus who snorted in alarm, and gave him a gentle but firm kick in the side and within seconds they were across the bridge and into the woods.

She didn't cry, though she felt like she should be. After all, not only was one of her most precious possessions a crumbling piece of charcoal by now, but her mother had just made it very clear that she would never be good enough. Considering all the years that she had worked for her mother's approval, this should have broken her.

Her head was also starting to hurt, and the speed at which they were traveling was making her dizzy. She buried her face in Angus's mane, uncaring of where they were going. She also could have sworn she heard something moving behind her but the wind in her ears made it impossible to be sure. Nothing to worry about anyways. Angus would have been panicking if there was something dangerous.

Which was exactly what he started to do moments later. A panicked whinny got her to look up as he suddenly veered off into thick brush. Branches whipped and smacked Merida in the head, forcing her to nearly flatten herself against her horse's back.

"Angus, calm down!" She tried to soothe him, but if anything he seemed to increase his speed. The main roads and trails long forgotten, he weaved through the trees effortlessly. Merida's hand rubbing his neck did little to calm him down. From what Merida could determine by the direction they were going in (which she wouldn't have held her breath on anyways) they were heading deep into the wilderness, and in no general direction any sort of civilization. Not that Merida hadn't gone exploring and gotten maybe a bit lost before, but at least she had been prepared. And they had never strayed too far from the trails, and it had been daylight. Oh, and she could bloody keep her head up!

Merida didn't know how many minutes had passed like this until the bush thinned enough for her to look up again and Angus started wheezing and they began to slow down to a trot. A sweat had broken out across his face and he made a rather distressed sound. Merida sighed and scratched his ear. "Well if you didn't scare so easily then we wouldn't be in this mess would we?" She muttered, taking a look around. She didn't really like what she saw.

Nothing but thick forest around them. No landmarks she recognized, and more unsettling, there were more dead trees than live ones like skeletons in the moonlight. Several seemed to have claw marks on them, but Merida told herself that whatever had caused that was probably long gone. With a sigh, she glared at the back of her horse's head. "Do you have any idea how to get home?"

Suddenly she heard something. Branches snapped behind them, and for a second she thought the thing that had mutilated the trees was closer than she thought. But to her confusion, Angus didn't seem bothered and merely turned around to face the direction of whatever was fighting it's way through the forest. Then she saw the light of torches, and heard something that filled her to the brim with relief.

"Are you sure she went this way?"

"Of course I'm sure!"

"Get your hair out of my face!"

"Eww, spit it out spit it out spit it out!"

Something unintelligible and Merida smiled , silently thanking every god she had ever heard of. Now she could follow them back and...well they would cross that bridge when they came to it.

Her three might-have-been suitors emerged. Will and Cormac, to her amusement, on the same horse. Gavin not far behind on one of the castle clydesdales. He grinned widely when he saw her. She grinned back. While usually she loathed the idea of just being some damsel in distress waiting for rescue, in this case, she decided she could make an exception.

"I see my knights in shining armor are here," She said wearily. "And you know what? I am perfectly fine with that."

"Hey she's alive!" Cormac said cheerfully, though he looked slightly uneasy. "We thought you were a goner for sure."

Merida was thankful that he was trying to joke it off. Make light of what happened. It made it easier. "They can't get rid of me that easily," She shrugged. "What are you doing here?"

"We saw you run off," Will said. "At first we thought that you'd be fine, but between your mum making the most terrifying face I'd ever seen, and your dad looking ready to come at us with an axe, we decided you could use the company."

"So we grabbed our stuff and stole a couple horses," Cormac continued. "Then the last we see is your horse's tail disappear so we followed along as best we could and here we are, which begs the question, what the hell happened?"

Giving Angus another glare, Merida sighed. "Well Dummy here got spooked and next thing I know I'm hanging on for dear life and by the time we stop I am so turned around I have no idea which way's the castle and which way's the ocean."

Cormac waved off her concerns. "Don't worry about that. I can get us back to the main trail easily! My Dad always said I got his sense of dire-"

But Will cut him off. "Merida what's wrong?"

She wasn't listening anymore. Angus had gone rigid under her, and she was staring wide eyed, at the dark, massive thing that had somehow crept up on them. It had stood up on it's hind legs. It wasn't even that it was a bear that had her terrified. A bear was one thing. It was the knotted and snarled fur, glossy eyes, and foam dripping from the corner of it's mouth that had an alarm bell ringing in her ears.

A bear was one thing. A starving, half mad bear was another thing entirely.

Sensing panic, the three boys slowly turned around simultaneously. There was a moment of horrible silence and stillness where Merida didn't dare move. The beast seemed to be waiting for someone to make the first move.

It was then broken by a rather embarrassingly high pitched squeal from Cormac.

The thing roared.

"RUN!" Merida screeched, giving Angus a swift kick in the side. He whinnied loudly and the two castle horses followed without waiting for any sort of command.

In the very back of her mind, deep underneath the mindless terror, Merida made a mental note to thank her mum for the advice. Princesses should not have weapons indeed.


End file.
